Mario & Luigi Vs. The Eunichs on Parade
One day, on or around June 17th, 1985, Luigi, and his fatass brother were sitting around eating spaghetti-o's when the phone rang. It was Mr. Gangrene again, it seemed that his pipes were backed up and needed some help to clean out his plumbing fast. Mario was confused as to why Mr. Gangrene had called him, until he remembered that he was in fact, a plumber. He informed Luigi of the situation, so they got their tools, pulled their pants down so their asscracks showed, and then proceeded to get into the van...
In nearly no time at all Mario and Luigi arrived at Mr.Gangrene's vinyl appliance factory. Mario ran inside to assess the situation, while Luigi was left with the burden of carrying in the tools. "Mama Mia!" shouted Luigi upon his arrival inside the factory. It seems Mario was already working on Mr.Gangrenes pipe.
"His pipe looks ready to burt and spew any minute!" exclaimed Luigi. "I know," said Mario, "so were going to have to work hard and fast." And work hard and fast they did. Mr. Gangrene could not believe the work the two brothers were doing to his pipe. For a pair of swarthy stereotypes who smelled of canned pasta, they sure knew how unclog someone's pipe!
"Before they knew it, they got a letter from some bitch Princess asking for them to save her from some spastic dinosaur named Bowser. Mario and Luigi were pissed because they wanted to go on a vacation to Dollywood and see if Dolly Parton would mind licking their ballsacks for a few bucks. The brothers packed their bags and headed down a giant green pipe located just outside Syracuse."
When they popped out the other side of the tube, they marveled once again how easy it is for plumbers to defy gravity. They looked around for the princess and then they saw her. She was laying in a puddle of her own vomit, babbling something about needing just a little more. Luigi knew that on this job, they would not only have to save the princess from the only smack dealer in the kindgom, but they were going to have to save her from herself.
Many other so-called superheroes (including Spiderman) had attempted to save her and failed, and were left to be sedated by mushrooms and eaten by rabid turtles. OUR heroes, however, were special, because they were Mario and Luigi, and could run through pipes really well. Naturally, they ate something that made them really big so that they could jump over stuff easier. Then they ate something else that made them shoot fireballs. Before long they became the bane of the evil horde, sending turtles spinning left and right and knocking out mushrooms before they even came close.
soon, Mario's weed began to wear off, and he became aware of Luigi's banter about needed to stay clear headed if they are going to take care of this evil turtle-looking smack dealer. Luigi was sick and tired of people becoming addicted to anything but his world-famous ravioli.
.....Well, that and his crack. Mario knew he could get her addicted, and add her to his harem of crackwhores. This is of course why they also do so much traveling in pipes. They find it's the safest way to traffic their drugs, after all who would find them in the sewer system. It was too perfect. Mario fired up a large blunt laced with boulder-like chunks of his finest product, slapped Luigi for being a condescending asswad, grabbed the dame, and began their trek.
On their way up the pipe, the princess clonked her pretty little idiot head on the side and was bleeding all over the place. Mario decided to drop her since he could care less about her anyway. A Koopa Troopa suckled on her greasy breasts before eating her and shitting out nothing but peppercorn shrimp. Mario and Luigi went off to go tend to their meth labs...
when suddenly there was a crash. It went like this: "CRAAAASH!!!" Mario was freaking out since he was already paranoid and started yelling that he needed Scully there to keep him grounded. Luigi started laughing, even though the crash was a car accident landing on his legs. But Luigi was flyin' high so he just duct taped a couple pipes to his legs while mumbling "we have the technology...", and off the two went, heading back to...
now it's your fool's job to keep it going. No one except for stu and josh were adding to it on my personal journal, but hopefully there is some creativity in here.